Wow, have I been in a funk. A big puddle of funk, covered in tar and topped off with a level of heavy-duty duct tape. Can't get any stickier or more depressing than that! Since writing my last post on how I understood the reasons for my seven year 'review' for Social Security Disability, the ante was upped...it was no longer just the mere annoyance of having to fill out page after page of invasive questions. As tedious as that was, I could get through it. It was having to physically prove, through a set of painful examinations, that yes...I have CMT. Hi...my name's Christine, and I have a peripheral neurological disorder. (Insert friendly greetings and clapping HERE.)
It wasn't just the pain the exams caused me, which was pretty intense. I think it was the compilation of everything...the pain, the embarrassing questionnaires, and the results that were reached by completing the exams. Even though I live this life everyday with a disability, which can often become so routine and, well...mundane in the many little ways I need to function, for the most part I remain positive. I have learned to laugh at my circumstances and at myself, because if you can't laugh at the absurdity of life, it can be a long and miserable adventure. Though this past week it was all kind of shoved in my face...the routine, the daily struggles, and the physical changes I have gone through in the past few years. Some of these changes I knew about, though many were surprising...and having to face up to all of that was difficult. I was left feeling degraded, and no one should ever have to feel that way.
But now all of that has passed, and Thanksgiving is here. I am working hard to find my positive energy again! This holiday is about being thankful, after all, and realizing what gifts you have in life. And though I may have a lot of challenges to deal with, I also have a lot to be thankful for. Wonderful friends and family whom I can trust and count on, adorable furry kitties that keep me entertained (and busy,) just to name a few. I also have the opportunity to use my artistic talents in a new way, to raise money for the CMTA...and that money will help find a cure for CMT. And that's just awesome!
Though all of those things are big...what about the little things? When you are evaluating your life and thinking about what you have to be thankful for, the big things easily come to mind. Maybe that's why it's so easy to forget to appreciate what we have all year round...all of those little things we have come to expect as a part of life, and don't even think about until they're gone. Food in the fridge, electricity and plumbing, clean water flowing from the tap. I am thankful to have all of those things, and if any one of them were missing, it would be a shock! Though for many, their struggle IS living without those daily conveniences that blend into the background for a lot of us. They may not have food to eat, or clean water, or even a roof over their head. This is the time of year where most of us try to remember those who are less fortunate, and give thanks for the gifts we do have have, no matter how small...though why limit those thoughts to one day a year?
Now don't get me wrong--by knowing there are others out there who have struggles, that does not make our own problems any less important...they are still real. When I was stuck under the duct tape, a good friend helped me realize this, and I was able to get myself unstuck a little quicker! Knowing what others may face doesn't diminish our own issues...it just helps us recognize what we do have in life so we can be thankful, and not take these gifts for granted. As Thanksgiving day draws to a close, I am keeping all of my friends and family close to my heart. You are all a big part of my life, and it would be a lot harder to live it without you! I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving with their family and friends like I had...and that you all found something in your lives to be thankful for!