Time speeds by, sometimes in a flash. Before you know it the years have passed; the children you've held in your arms are cradling you now, in theirs...roles are reversed, and there is never enough time. Never, EVER enough time.
This was going to be a post about hate. This was going to be words about people who so clearly needed help but didn't receive it in time; and the backlash of confusion and destruction that was the outcome. Though how can I put my feelings into the right words and have them matter...can I ever say enough to make that happen? My blog is mostly about living with the types of struggles I face on a daily basis, because that is what I know. That is my reality, no matter how often I wish it weren't. I can't face this unknown reality...it makes no sense to me; like mismatched puzzle pieces that build nothing in the end. When I say I cannot imagine the torment the families of the recent victims in Newtown, Connecticut are experiencing, I really mean that...I CAN'T IMAGINE IT. I'm sure the families felt the same way just a short time ago, when their loved ones were still safe and they could hold them in their arms. I know that is a reality they would gladly embrace again, if only given the chance.
Stories like this one bring tears to my eyes, and a pain to my heart. I believe it is important to remain positive, pay it forward and put as much love out into the world as you can...it is the only way we can ever hope to counteract such violence and hate! And then something so tremendous, so DEVASTATING happens, and the path grows dark again. We shake our heads, we shed our tears and pray...and hopefully hold our loved ones closer and give thanks that they are still here. We appreciate who we have in our lives all the more, realizing how precious and how short life can truly be. And tomorrow a new day starts, and we do our best to move forward.
I don't know if there is something I am missing...if there is something I should be doing that I am not, to make the negativity in the world grow smaller. I know I feel inadequate right now, and always do during such times. As I said before...this was going to be a post about hate. Though in all honesty, I can't go down that path. It is just too dark to navigate, with huge potholes I can't even begin to crawl out of, or hope to avoid. The most I can pray for is that the light will grow brighter...for the shadows to recede, the monsters to fall back, and for things to make sense again. I can hope that when the light of day is at its brightest, we remember what happened...and we take measures to keep the light shining, so that this type of negativity no longer holds power. And I can love. With abandon, with honesty, and with my whole heart...so that everyone who is important in my life is held just a little closer, and loved just a little more. Each and every day.
A lot of my Facebook friends have been posting prayers and words of sympathy, to keep the light shining...to help those dark shadows recede. I am sharing this one in particular, because it resonated with me the most. My prayers go out to all the families in Newtown who have suffered and lost during this most recent tragedy...may they make their way through this darkness, and find some peace. And may we all see that time grows ever shorter, and hold our loved ones close while we can.